A series of articles by Robert Buchanan, D.Min., on gay prejudice and
Christianity in order to challenge the church and help provide for the
spiritual needs of sexual minorities
Please bookmark this page and come back.
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A series of articles by Robert Buchanan, D.Min., on gay prejudice and
Christianity in order to challenge the church and help provide for the
spiritual needs of sexual minorities
Please bookmark this page and come back.
|
|
|
My New Friend
I met a new
friend the other day at a party. We talked and became acquainted for quite
some time. I thoroughly enjoyed meeting him because we seemed to have so much
in common. We are close in age, we both were married and have children, and
we both came from a strict church background. His struggle of coming out,
divorce, and connecting with a genuine intimate relationship, sounded a great
deal like my own, and so many others who came out later in life.
It was so hard
to live life in the closet. Especially being in a strict religious setting
and not allowing yourself to think that the reason you are attracted to the
guy down the street is that you are gay. Thinking, “I can’t be gay. If I am
gay, I can’t be a Christian.” The conflict and stress when our idealistic
religious ideas don’t match our inner self can cause more pain and suffering
than anyone deserves. Yet we continue in this cycle, and hundreds if not
thousands of gays, lesbians, bisexual, and transgender Christians think these
kinds of thoughts every single day.
For me it was a
nurse in a hospital that God used to wake me up to the fact that I am a
Christian and I am Gay, and that is the way it is supposed to be. I had
already spent years studying the Bible and found that what people claimed the
Bible said about being gay was simply not there. Some modern translations
make it sound otherwise, but the New Testament never deals with a loving
mutual intimate relationship between two people of the same sex. Jesus never
said a single thing to condemn gays, though he mentioned quite a few problems
in heterosexual relationships. Jesus didn’t hesitate to hug men, and to allow
his cousin to lie on his breast during an emotional time during the Last
Supper. If gays are so dangerous, you would think Jesus would have said
something.
It took a long
time for me to unlearn all the prejudice, bias, fear, and misunderstanding
that is accepted as truth in most of the church and society. Even then, I had
to have my own emotional and spiritual catharsis to realize in my heart that I
am indeed both Christian and gay. It was such a wonderful day when I
recognized that fact in my inner most being. My friend I met the other day
still has some struggles to work through, but I pray for him on his journey of
acceptance and faith.
Most
denominations have a long way to go before they get rid of the philosophy of
prejudice against sexual minorities. Regardless of how long it takes, let’s
pray for change in the church, but, most of all, lets pray that gay people
will not give up on Christianity, but find a place of true acceptance. For
when I found spiritual acceptance, I found out what a friend Jesus truly is.
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Robert Buchanan is a minister of the Ecumenical Catholic Church and a psychotherapist who lives with his partner of many years in Durham North Carolina. He is the author of Love, Honor & Respect: How to Confront Homosexual Bias in Christian Culture and serves as director of the Institute for Inclusive Christianity. a training program for ministers and clergy who do not discriminate against gays, lesbians, bisexuals, or because of financial, familial or social status. Additional resources for inclusive Christians can be found at our Resources page.
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